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LOVE4MOMMA
Regular
Joined: 22 Jul 2008
Posts: 43
Location: Kentucky
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 Posted: Tue Jul 29, 2008 12:08 pm Post subject: Hope and Fear |
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My mom was diagnosed with Stage IV pancreatic cancer with liver mets. about a month ago. Her CA19-9 was 40,300!! That seems much higher than what I've been reading in these forums. Is anyone familiar and can anyone explain what the tumor marker means? I'm assuming it's the tumor's activity level, but I'm not sure. She's had 3 chemo treatments (Gemzar). This is her week off. She will be 50 on August the 7th. I planned a big Birthday party for her this Saturday!!! She seems to be feeling better recently. I have both hope and fear for her.
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Crystal
I love my momma!!
http://www.carepages.com/carepages/Cynthia |
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brainman
Site Admin
Joined: 13 Oct 2005
Posts: 4209
Location: Tennessee
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| Posted: Wed Jul 30, 2008 9:05 am Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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Hi Crystal. I am very sorry about your mother's advanced Pancreatic Cancer. Pancreatic Cancer is one of the worse cancers a person can have: It has such a drastic impact of the quality of live of the person and we have so feel weapons to use against it.
C19-9 is a protein found in the blood. It is NOT specific enough to be used to diagnose Pancreatic Cancer or how advanced it is. Its only use is as a tool to follow the effectiveness of the therapy. The absolute number is not what is critical. What you would like to see is a steady decrease as your mother's treatment continues. That will show you that the chemotherapy is or is not working.
You and your mother are in my thoughts and prayers.
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Jim
Site Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendoglioma grade 3, same location.
My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029
Blog http://jimhawkinsport.blogspot.com/ |
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LOVE4MOMMA
Regular
Joined: 22 Jul 2008
Posts: 43
Location: Kentucky
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 9:32 am Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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Thank you so much for your response and prayers. Thank you for explaining the CA19-9. She is increasingly more tired everyday. Makes me sad. Its really hard to wrap my head around it all. Some times i think this just can't be happening. I don't want to lose her, she is my rock. Its been a hard week for me emotionally. I'm very scared!!
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Crystal
I love my momma!!
http://www.carepages.com/carepages/Cynthia |
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jessica026
Regular
Joined: 17 Jan 2008
Posts: 39
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 11:48 am Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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It is scary i know..my mom would have been 50 this january, and i was really hoping she would make it so we could have a big party for her to.
please spend lots of time with your mom and tell her you love her everyday..this disease is terrible!
i hope she responds to chemo, and i pray for you and your family during this time |
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LOVE4MOMMA
Regular
Joined: 22 Jul 2008
Posts: 43
Location: Kentucky
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 1:36 pm Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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Thank you so much for your prayers and I'm very sorry about your mom. My mom recently taught me how to cross stitch!! I'm so glad I can carry that on (its something she loves to do). Now I can teach my daughters!! It's so crazy how your world just flips upside down. I was real strong at first, but recently it seems to be harder to deal with at times. My kids keep me busy and that helps to keep my mind off of it. Mom didn't want to know how much time she has and the dr.'s didn't offer, but everything I've researched says 3 to 6 months and we are going into month 3. That is scary. How fast do you start to go down with this? Can you be fine and then take a downward spiral? Mom seems to be ok other than some back pain reacurring recently and being tired.
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Crystal
I love my momma!!
http://www.carepages.com/carepages/Cynthia |
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jessica026
Regular
Joined: 17 Jan 2008
Posts: 39
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 1:43 pm Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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my mom was doing chemo every week and we were told she had 1-2 years left..she went back to work after she recovered enough from surgery and all that stuff..she was doing great and was happy to be back to work and leading a somewhat normal life.
it was a matter of days that she started to spiral down..it happened so very fast...she was fine on friday and then that monday she was having a hard time getting dressed for work...running into things, and just not doing well at all, and everyday it got worse, and soon she was barely ever awake and 3 weeks later she passed.
thats just my experience though, and i am not saying thats what will happen to your mom, but thats how fast it went for us. |
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LOVE4MOMMA
Regular
Joined: 22 Jul 2008
Posts: 43
Location: Kentucky
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 2:02 pm Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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Mom is not able to have surgery unfortunately. She does chemo every week, well 3 weeks on 1 week off and so on. She is still able to go out and about. I live about 5 mins. down the road from her and everytime an ambulance goes by... I wonder and worry. Then I have to call and BS with her just to make sure she's ok. I don't mention the ambulance that just went by, cause I don't want her to know how much I worry. I have to stay strong for her, ya know. How old are you Jessica?
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Crystal
I love my momma!!
http://www.carepages.com/carepages/Cynthia |
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jessica026
Regular
Joined: 17 Jan 2008
Posts: 39
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 2:06 pm Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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| i am 27..28 at the end of sept |
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LOVE4MOMMA
Regular
Joined: 22 Jul 2008
Posts: 43
Location: Kentucky
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 2:12 pm Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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I am 30. I never in a million years thought this would happen. I thought I'd have my mom around till I was old and gray. When did your mom pass if you don't mind me asking?
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Crystal
I love my momma!!
http://www.carepages.com/carepages/Cynthia |
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jessica026
Regular
Joined: 17 Jan 2008
Posts: 39
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 2:28 pm Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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me either..i never imagined...and i never imagined she could be sick for so long and the drs just not figuring it out..all her symptoms pointed so clearly to pancreatic cancer (now that i have researched it ...its like they just werent seeing it)....she had symptoms for about 3.5 yrs so in my mind i believe she survived with cancer that long.
i am raisng two boys on my own, and the only reason i thought i could do it is becuase my mom was behind me every step of the way, now i am truly doing it alone and man its hard!
she passed away july 1st of this year so its still pretty new and it feels like she is just gone on vacation and she'll be back soon...and i dont think it has quite really hit me yet.
xmas was her favorite time of year and she loved to spoil us all rotten..pick the perfect tree, and bake like a maniac...so i think around that time it will become more 'real' to me |
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LOVE4MOMMA
Regular
Joined: 22 Jul 2008
Posts: 43
Location: Kentucky
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 2:40 pm Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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I'm so so sorry. Christmas is our favorite time of year too!! I just hope and pray mom makes it for Christmas. My mom had pancreatitis about 2 and a half years ago and it makes me think she's had it since then, now looking back. Wow, how parrallel we are. I have 2 girls, 2 and 9 yrs old. My mom has been my rock for everything. She's my best friend. We talk probably 10 times a day if I'm not over at her house. How old are your boys?
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Crystal
I love my momma!!
http://www.carepages.com/carepages/Cynthia |
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jessica026
Regular
Joined: 17 Jan 2008
Posts: 39
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 3:01 pm Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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my boys are 4yrs and 9months..she was in the delivery room with me with both of them, and that is a memory i will always have and treasure.
i miss her most when one of them does something for the 1st time..i used to call her all the time for silly things like "mom how long do i cook this roast for?"..."mom Blake started crawling today"..well i guess you know what i mean 
we also worked together at the post office, and i will have to go back to work in Nov and i dont know if i can do it...i went in there the other day and it just reminds me of her so much..its going to be really hard to be there.
my dads having a tough time too but he takes my 4yr old overnight and on camping trips quite often and that helps keep him distracted |
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LOVE4MOMMA
Regular
Joined: 22 Jul 2008
Posts: 43
Location: Kentucky
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 3:11 pm Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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My heart goes out to you. My relationship is the same way with my mom!! I call her to ask everything or share something the girls did. She was my baby sitter while I worked, and she's unable to watch my 2 yr old for very long at all. I don't want to put that stress on her and she has a hard time picking her up with the back pain and pain in her ribs. I know it has to be hard for you. Has it gotten any easier at all? I'm so scared. I just feel like I'll fall completely apart if she passes.
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Crystal
I love my momma!!
http://www.carepages.com/carepages/Cynthia |
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jessica026
Regular
Joined: 17 Jan 2008
Posts: 39
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 3:16 pm Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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as a mom i havent really had the chance to fall apart..I still cry just about every night when i go to bed, and i dont know when it is going to get easier...i guess i am hoping for some sign that she is ok..i am not a religious person at all but i guess i am spiritual,
i had my 1st dream about her the other night, and she looked so happy and healthy, and i woke up sad and happy all at the same time...its tough to deal with but i hope it gets easier.
i sent you a PM too |
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LOVE4MOMMA
Regular
Joined: 22 Jul 2008
Posts: 43
Location: Kentucky
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| Posted: Mon Aug 25, 2008 3:43 pm Post subject: Re: Hope and Fear |
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My kids keep me going. Mom doesn't really seem that sick, but I'm a realist and understand and know that eventually she will pass. I cry away from my kids. My oldest is 9 and she is very mature for her age, but sensitive and understands what is going on. She is very close to my mom as well and I think it will crush her.
I responded to your pm
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Crystal
I love my momma!!
http://www.carepages.com/carepages/Cynthia |
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