Depressed Spouse

NewlyWedWife · Posted: Wed Aug 13, 2008 7:29 pm Post subject: Depressed Spouse

How do I beat the Blahs! I know it's selfish, but over the past 5 months while my husband has been undergoing treatment, my mood and depression has gone from occassional to worse. I can't help but feel stuck. We are now housebound because of pain and fatigue and we are it, no one else to help, so I'm stuck in the house too except for the necessary. We are newly married of 14months, and all I feel is terrible because we couldnt even enjoy our first year together, and now, nothing, all our hopes and dreams are going down the tube along with our finances. I'm in a rut!
_________________
Believe
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Husband has Lung Cancer & Brain Tumor NSCLC Stage IV
Diagnosed Mar 2008
37 Yrs Old
Smoker 15 years
- - - - - -
My story thus far: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=9545
- - - - - -
Current treatments & Meds:
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=9550

brainman · Posted: Thu Aug 14, 2008 5:48 am Post subject: Re: Depressed Spouse

I know what a rut feels like. It is not easy to care for someone who is homebound. Have you considered talking to a psychiatrist or your own GP to get an anti depressant? I have to take them occasionally. There are some very safe but still effective ones out there. Depression is like a dark tunnel. Anti depressant are like a flashlight. They just help you through the darkness until you can start to see the light at the other end.

You also need to get out... even if it is just to walk around the house a few times or to chat with a neighbor. Try to find someone to stay with your husband while you and friends go to the mall for a few hours. You are not abandoning him; you are making sure that your mental health is good enough so that you can continue to take care of him.

You and your husband are in my thoughts and prayers.
_________________
Jim
Site Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendoglioma grade 3, same location.
My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029
Blog http://jimhawkinsport.blogspot.com/

LizNDale · Posted: Thu Aug 14, 2008 1:29 pm Post subject: Re: Depressed Spouse

NNW-

Our oncologist's office has a social worker that we can call, though we haven't needed to yet. They also have programs we can attend - educational, supportive and coping skills.

You might want to check with your oncologist to see if they have anything to offer.

Some web sites that may help:

http://www.wellspouse.org/
http://www.nfcacares.org/
http://www.canceradvocacy.org/toolbox/10-caring-for-the-caregiver/

I hope you get some relief. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers...

Liz
_________________
My Mother - Stage IV NSCLC - Adenocarcinoma
Mets to Adrenal Glands and Brain
Diagnosed Thursday June 12th 2008
Died Sunday September 7th 2008

Her Story:
http://cancerforums.net/about9639.html
Her Statement of Faith Memorial:
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=10528

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