Stage IV Esopageal Cancer

LSS · New User Joined: 21 Jun 2005 Posts: 2

I just wanted to share my story. In April of this year my dad was diagnosed with esophageal cancer and was still undergoing various tests to determine what stage it was at. I live overseas and decided I better fly home to help him go through this. I had just seen him over the Christmas holidays and he seemed to be doing fine. I was shocked when I arrived to his home. He had lost 50 lbs in 3 months and was unable to eat or drink. He didn't want to worry the family so he waited until the last minute to ask for our help. My parents have been seperated a long time but are great friends. She didn't know either. We both arrived within one day of each other. We later found out he is stage IV and inoperable. The cancer had spread to his liver.

Since then we have been taking care of him. Surgery is out of the question so they offered him agressive chemo treatments to relieve some of the symptoms. He has been through 3 rounds so far and is responding well. He is able to eat and drink now and feels so much better. So much so that he constantly speaks of remission. We know this is unrealistic but that is how much the chemo and use of steroids have helped. Unbeliveably, with this type of rarer cancer, my mom and I took care of my mom's brother just 3 years ago with the exact same cancer. He was diagnosed earlier and lived over 3 years. It took a huge toll on us as we didn't know what to expect. It changed us for sure. You would think that we would be totally overwhelmed by having to cope a second time but the opposite has happened. We feel strengthened by having been through this before and we seem better able to support my dad. He has been amazing.......taking everything so well. Of course we all still have our moments but we have been trying to make the best of the time he has left. I know he doesn't have long and finally we've been able to say things to one another we have never said before.

I guess I'm posting this because I feel it doesn't have to be a terrible painful experience. I know there are many scared people out there looking for answers and asking why!! I found that just accepting it and then doing your best to support your family member is all you can do. Love one another and support each other. You're not alone! The worst is that you feel helpless in helping, knowing the outcome in the late stages will not change.....so live for today and enjoy your time together so that there are no regrets.

My best wishes to all who have to go through this.

tia · New User Joined: 03 Sep 2005 Posts: 1 Location: Vancouver

Hi there, my name is Tia. Your posting was the first i clicked on when checking out this site. It turned out to be the right one to click on. As I write, I'm in japan, and will be flying back home in a week. My father has advanced esophagal cancer which has spread to his stomach and bowls. I've only been in Japan for one month and a half - here to teach English, and I actually haven't started teaching yet, but now I'm in the throes of packing and getting everything organized to come home. Before I left for Japan, my Dad knew how bad it was, but he really wanted me to go, so he lied about the biopsy results. Even now, he hassn't told me that it's terminal, but I've talked to his doctor recently and gotten thee full story.
Anyhow, I don't know how much of this he's still denying. I'm really his only family - my mom and him seperated when I was 5, though she and my aunt have stepped in to help him and he's cool with that.
I know it'll be difficult in a lot of ways, but i do feel like this can be a really uplifting expereince amongst all the sadness and pain.
So thanks for your posting, it was comforting to read about someone who's been through something similar to what I'm experiencing.
Take care,
Tia

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