brainman
Chief Admin
Joined: 13 Oct 2005
Posts: 4440
Location: Tennessee
|
 Posted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 2:27 pm Post subject: Sam Morris aka TSMorris |
 |
|
Last October, we had a young father join our community because he had brain cancer. Sam was a 27 year old loving husband and father of a little 2 year old girl. He only posted 3 messages but really had an impact on me. When he did not post for a while, I sent him an email and received a reply from his wife. Since then, we have exchanged emails periodically. I asked if I could share some of these emails with you and she gave me permission. I will let her tell the rest of his story.
_______
{My first email to TS}
Hi TS, I hope this email is not too intrusive I just cannot bring myself to post this message onto the forum. You may have read that just last week one of your long-term survivors of Pancreatic Cancer died. Marty was a very good web-friend of mine and it hurts a lot.
Reading your last post brought back all sorts of memories. Just over nine years ago, my mother died with a GBM grade IV, two months after first diagnosis. I am a 15 year survivor of a brain cancer that, like yours, started as a grade 2 astrocytoma. But your cancer was progressed so much faster than mine. All of my children are grown and past the trick or treating age. Oh, how I wish I could give you some of my years. I am crying just thinking about you. I sucks that at age 27 (?) your goal is to live to see the new year when it should be to see your child grow into a beautiful adult.
I am sorry if I am depressing you. It is just that we are so far behind in finding a cure for this thing.
Post whenever you feel like it. You can also email me if you wish. My heart reaches out to you and your family tonight.
Peace, Love, Hope
{end}
{reply received Nov 11, 2007}
Hi Jim,
This is Sam's wife. His name is Thomas S., We call him Sam. (Just wanted to bring you up to speed on the "TS" thing.)
Thank you for your email. It was very kind of you to reach out to Sam. He really appreciates it. Unfortunately, he's not using the computer much anymore. His ability to comprehend what he's reading has become too difficult. I help him as much as possible - reading him emails, responding with him, etc. etc.
Our Halloween was a great one. Sam was able to do a small amount of trick or treating with our daughter and LOVED every second of it. He was discharged from the hospital and signed into Hospice just in time to hit the streets, begging for candy. 
I'm sorry about your mother. I can only imagine your pain. GBM's are still very new to us and I can't seem to wrap myself around the idea that it is so aggressive. Two months is a quick blink of time. It has only been two years since his original diagnosis. I lived happily in denial, enjoying our marriage and daughter.. Now, I watch his every breath and Thank God. Life can change so quickly.
Please stay in contact as much or little as you feel comfortable. I will read anything you send to Sam or I and respond as much as he can.. Thanks again - you really made him feel special.
Take care of yourself,
{end}
{email received February 27, 2007}
Dear Jim,
I'm sorry it has been so long, if you even remember me.. I am Sam's wife. He started posting on your website in October if I'm recalling correctly..
Sam passed away January 2, 2008. He fought and loved hard until his last breath. We moved him into the Hospice Care Center 3 weeks before for pain management but I fully believed he would come home after the morphine pump was under control. We all did. His decline was so rapid that he changed daily. It was heartbreaking and ... I'm sorry, I'm having trouble writing you through my tears..
Our daughter is still very confused and wants to go see Daddy daily. That is devastating.
We had an amazing experience in November that I will share with you, if you are interested. I don't want to completely unload on you unless you care to listen.. These last memories are sacred..
I'm sorry. This is the first time I've had to put in email any of this and it's next to impossible. My heart is broken.
Take care,
{end}
{email received Feb 28, 2008}
Our daughter is two. Sam did a wonderful job leaving her videos, birthday cards *18 years worth* and gifts. He was amazingly brave and full of love. She will know that.. everyone who ever met him knew that she was his light. We have a memorial DVD with family pictures and photos of him everywhere. It is my goal to make sure he's never far away for her. Even if that makes it more painful for me..
He is buried in my hometown. We spent our summers there together and had planned on moving back to the Midwest when our daughter reached school age. We grew up only 3 hours apart although we met 1300 miles away from our hometowns.. It is incredibly painful to not be able to visit his grave at a moments notice but I have family there who puts flowers for me and we will spend this summer there.
Please share our story. I know he really enjoyed this board even if it was short lived. Thanks for your email and kind words.
{end}
_________________
So many children whose parent dies when they are very your grow up with a sense on abandonment, that their parent did not love them enough or that they were not good enough to have a father. Sam did a very wonderful thing for his daughter. She will know that he cared.
Sam, rest in the arms of the Immortal.
GBM sucks 
_________________
Jim
Site Administrator and long-term cancer survivor
1992 Astrocytoma grade 2, left motor strip
2005 Recurrence this time said to be an Oligodendroglioma grade 3, same location.
http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=2405My Story Part 1: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=2528
My Story Part 2: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?p=7350
My Story Part 3: http://cancerforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=8029
Blog http://jimhawkinsport.blogspot.com/ |
|
EJM68
New User
Joined: 07 Feb 2008
Posts: 5
|
| Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:02 pm Post subject: Sam's wife |
|
|
My heart goes out to you and your daughters. I am faced with the same issue right now. I have a 6 year old lil angel who I have on a shared custody basis. I've been given anywhere from 1 1/2 yrs to 2 years since diagnosed with Glioblastoma Gr. 4.
I appreciate your sharing of everything that Sam did to make surethe girls remember him and know that he is always close by. I plan on doing some of those very same things When I cry, its for my daughter, not me. I just feel so angry and sad that she won't have her daddy beside her for all those special times as she develops into a young woman
Sincerely,
Ed
_________________
Ed McDade
Glioblastoma Grade 4
Diagnosed 02/05/08 |
|
Search 
Email Digests
Register to post
Profile 
Check private messages 
Log in
What is this ?
We subscribe to the HONcode principles. Verify here. All content and posts are copyright.
