I think my sister is faking Cancer :(

SadSister · New User Joined: 27 Jun 2008 Posts: 3

My sister has told me she has cancer and is recieving chemo.... There was a few years that she didnt talk to my mother and I because of something really little. At that time she had a mole cut out of her neck and some kind of lump cut out of her lower back. After we had made contact with her after those few years she had a very short hair cut and told us that was from the treatmt she was receiving. We then all grew closer as we were living close to each other. It was then that I started to doubt her. She would never let anyone go to these treatmets with her including her husband, she would drive for an hour or more home after these treatments. I called the hospital that she was going to and they said that they were not treating anyone at that time with chemo. The doctors name she told me was not even registered as far as I could see. It was costing her alot of money to have these treatments and she said she could not claim any money back because she was going private. My sister also made a claim that the Blue Nurses helped her with transport sometimes as we live in a rural area, but when I called them they had never heard of her. One day my sister shaved all of her hair off because she said it was going to fall out anyway and she started wearing a scarf. After this treatment she apparently lost all of her hair in her pubic area (so she toldme) but seemed to still have her eye brows and general skin hair on her arms and neck. I fronted her about these things and again she has just gone and shut me out. I did it in a way that was respectful. I feel that she is faking her illness because there are so many other things that just dont add up. Her own son that is 18yrs said that someof her stories are weird and he has seen hr shopping at the time these treatments are supposed to be happening. This has consumed me and is something that I cant get out of my head... Is there any way that I can find out if she is really sick, because if so I want to be there for her, but something in my heart is telling me she is just being the attention seeker she has always been.... It sounds selfish on my part that i wantto delve into her personal life but this is seriously causing me to lose my mind. My sister has 5 boys that are from 18 to 6yrs old..... Why would someone tell their own children they are dying?? I dont understand, someone please give me some idea of how to go about working this out. I feel for the people that do have this problem and find it a huge disrespect on her part for the ill. SadSister.[/quote]

brainman

SadSister, we periodically do receive questions like yours. I have never really had a good answer because the issues involved are so complex. I prefer to trust your sister. If she does have cancer, you will be glad that you believed her. If she is lying, what have you lost? Let me be the devil's advocate for a moment... some people to live a life of lies for whatever reasons they have. Some people do not what their families to be more involved in their treatments because they do not what to be a burden on others. It does sound like your sister is keeping you at an arm's distance for whatever reason. It is just a very complex situation.

What kind of cancer does she say she has? What kind of treatment is she receiving?
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SadSister · New User Joined: 27 Jun 2008 Posts: 3

Thankyou for replying to my message. I am not sure what exact type of cancer she claims to have, I know at one point she did mention something about lymph glands or something like that. The treatment is chemo occasionally and at some stage she said that she was taking it in tablet form. A year or so ago she said that she was going for radium treatment in Brisbane and went by herself because of being locked in a room without anyone being able to enter, and that was a day that shewas found at her friends house and not at the hospital like she said.

I understand what you are saying about not wanting people to fuss whilst being sick, but my sister is such a person that if she has a headache she needs someone to rub her head for her, and if anything else comes along in life that is serious she needs people by her side, thats why i think that this is so different for her not to have people with her at such hard times(especially her husband).

Whilst I message on this page sounding so negative I still always keep in the back of my mind that she may be sick, but it i so hard to believe...... I know my sister..... Sad

honeysuckle · Regular Joined: 04 Aug 2007 Posts: 34

With all the proof you have of her being elsewhere, it would be so hard to believe she is sick. Plus you know her behaviour from before. Is there some way for her to seek counselling with her family? She could have a mental disorder. I feel for you though. One of my sisters has cancer, the other one fakes every major illness known out there. She hasn't said she has cancer YET though. I have an understanding of where you're coming from. My "well" sister, would say she has diseases that are hard to diagnose. She is known to fabricate stuff so if ONE day she gets something serious, it will be so hard to believe her. PM me if you need someone to chat with. I really understand your frustration.

SadSister · New User Joined: 27 Jun 2008 Posts: 3

Thankyou so much for your reply...

I am still at a stand still on this, not sure what to do. I know for sure that for me to admit that councelling is a good idea would not go down so well. I may have to sit on the fence and just see what the outcome is. The hardest thing is that it is in my mind all day everyday. I suppose I am lucky that is my only problem... Still if anyone has any ideas please contact me

Thanks

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